Things My Father Taught Me: Shaun Barneveld

Shaun Barnevald of Trimmed with Gold Above takes time to reflect on the importance of honesty.

Ask the writers of most lifestyle blogs out there, “who influences your style?” and the answer will almost always be their father. Most will go into a detailed description of the clothing they wear or the items they own. That is not the case with me.

While this is a Father’s Day article, and yes, my father is one of my major inspirations, it isn’t because he is stylish or has a great collection of personal items (though he possesses great potential). I know his likes and dislikes and I’ve seen the way he dressed before he met my mother (she just needs to stop getting him Ed Hardy shirts and clothing of the like; she did work for Ed Hardy at one time, so it is quite understandable). Nevertheless, my father is my major influence because of who he is not what he wears which in my eyes is how it should be.

There are few lessons I have learned in life more valuable than those my Father taught me. They’re basic but hard to come by in today’s world. I commend my father for not only teaching but also living these lessons. I see a lot of lying, cheating and stealing, and I find it appalling. My father told me time and time again to tell the truth at any cost. I’ll be honest, when I was young I would lie. I did it in order to avoid getting in trouble, but it never worked. I always got caught, and while I was never grounded, my parents disappointment was too much to bear. I wound up punishing myself. My father would tell me that he and my mother could not get mad if I told the truth but if I lied and got caught, I would get in bigger trouble than I could have for any actions I could have made. And he stuck to his word. When the truth was told I would not get in trouble, I would just get the talk.

Like he stuck to his word, he always told me to stick to mine. To not make promises I could no uphold, and to fulfill my promises no matter what it took to do so. And if a favor was done for you repayment of any sort was a must. What I have always gotten from this is that Karma is not something that arbitrarily happens, you have to make it happen. It all starts with your attitude and ends with your actions. “Do unto other what you would want done unto you.” And so, I have.

Everyone gives credit to my mother for the way I am, and as much as she has been an influence on me, it was as a child that I would watch my Father and learn from his example. I love him more than life itself and know he is reading this. He supports me in all my ventures and is probably the most loyal fan of my site. He reads it everyday. That is what I call a Father.

Shaun Barnevald, Trimmed with Gold Above