When we were kids, my brother Ben was an avid collector of the strangest things: rocks, cardboard tubes, socks, and carrot sticks (don’t ask). Thankfully, as he entered adulthood, his cotton for collecting diminished. Socks, particularly boldly colorful ones, were the only collectible that managed to maintain his interest. To this day, anytime I see a remarkable pair, I feel obligated to buy them for my brother. That’s why, when I saw Garrett Colton’s schizo stockings at his newly renamed shop on Beverly Boulevard in sunny Los Angeles, California, it was safe to say I’d grab a pair for Ben.


The collection, a motley crew of crew socks are Garrett’s first offering from his forthcoming full line of collaborations with Rene Holguin, the owner of RTH, a perfectly appointed store near Garrett’s on North La Cienega.


They combined their names and came up with GAR.RTH. I’ve been wearing GAR.RTH’s socks since leaving Los Angeles, and I’ll tell you, they have the most incredible cushion. I’ll also tell you with absolutely no shame that I cannot pull them on,  stretching the crew length leg without saying to myself, “Ribbed for her pleasure. Ew.” Wouldn’t it be cool if Dana Carvey was their spokesman? I’m not holding my breath, but someone please make that happen.


Until then, I can think of a couple brothers who will happily sport these socks whenever and wherever they can. Oh, and Ben, where’d you hide the carrots?

G. Colton’s grand opening is Saturday, March 30th in Los Angeles, California. Be there.